28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
26: T hou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!
19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.
16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
14: Friends don 't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
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